Last night, I had a conversation with a friend who said that if I’m ACTUALLY looking to date someone, OkCupid might not be my best outlet.
Slash. Duh. I’ve sorta put OkCupid on the back-burner because of Snatched and because… well… it hasn’t been that fruitful. [Though it HAS provided hours of entertainment!]
Yesterday, as I was leaving my therapist’s office, there was a gentleman with two adorable dogs outside. As I passed him, he stopped me.
DogGuy: What does your shirt say? I’m a…?
Me: I’m a music nut. Cute dogs! Are they yorkies?
DogGuy: Yeah, they’re actually teacup yorkies. We* got really lucky cause they have no health issues or anything.
Me: Well they are super cute.
DogGuy: So.. um… I didn’t actually stop you because I wanted to know what your shirt said. I think you’re really attractive, and I was wondering if you might want to go out and get a drink or dinner or something sometime.
Me: Uh… [I hesitate, but then I remember that it is the Summer of Yes, and so…] Yeah. Sure.
DogGuy: Cool! You know. I mean. How do you hit on people these days? Like this? Like on the sidewalk? I’m usually not this awkward, but you know, it’s summer and I’m tired of being alone and going home alone and… [trails off..]
Me: Yeah… I know what you mean.
DogGuy: Cool, well can I get your number?
[We do the number exchange.]
DogGuy: Oh! California! Cool!
Me: Yeah, it’s the best. I love it there.
DogGuy: Yeah. Well, I’m from New York… But I’ve lived in other places like Atlanta and stuff, so I’m not a total weirdo or crazy or… you know… [trails off again].
You guys. What can I say? It’s the Summer of Yes. The answer is always yes, right? [*Also, who is this ‘we’?]
And, lest we think that awkward pick-ups on New York City streets are sort of unbearable, I present you with a round-up of recent messages:
SuitorWithNoProfilePicture: Gorgeous pics and your profile piqued my interest. New to OKC and still figuring this place out a bit. Im 6′, 180lbs, short brown hair, blue eyes, broad shoulders, athletic, cute and VERY well endowed (I promise). Id love to chat and see what you are looking for in here. Hope that youre having a good weekend and that we can chat soon…Ill be online for a bit.
I haven’t responded, but I’m thinking the ONLY appropriate response is: Pictures or I don’t believe it. [And you KNOW what sort of pictures I’m talking about…]
Obviously I’m trying to find love where others are just trying to get laid.
NightOwl: Come have some free wine with me at a lounge in the village, lil cute Blonde~~>! Just a thought
This message was received at 1:40 am. I mean… I MAY be on OkCupid at 1:40 am, but I am ALSO most definitely in my bed. I think I have a post-1:00 am trump-card for Summer of Yes, right?
You guys. I CAN’T WIN! Spinsterhood is sounding more appealing by the hour.