Things I’m Thinking

I’m still in California right now and I’m sick. It is the worst. So, in my fuzzy-brained sickness, I’m having a hard time generating coherent sentences. These are the things that are cluttering my MotrinMind. 

1. Monsanto. I know I’m tardy to this party, but what the fuck? I was looking at this picture on Jezebel and the first thought that came to my mind was, “There isn’t one lady in this picture who is overweight.”

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I mean, I guess we could easily assume that immediately post-picture, these 8 ladies took a SoulCycle class together or did their CrossFit WOD.

NOT.

I’m pretty sure that exactly 0/8 ladies in this picture even owned a pair of sneakers. 

WHAT IS OUR FOOD DOING TO US?! I read this article this morning, and I just felt horrified afterward. 

I’m going to try and make the switch to organic immediately. 

2. This is 2013. WHY HAVEN’T WE DISCOVERED THE CURE TO THE COMMON COLD?! Also, why isn’t there an awesome backless-strapless bra on the market? Why isn’t there an amazing strapless bra, for that matter? Why can’t we teleport? Why can’t the gays marry? THIS IS 2013, PEOPLE!

3. Sandra Lee. Why does she still have shows on The Food Network? She’s the actual worst. 

That’s all I’ve got right now. I’m just going to take my Kleenex and crawl back into bed now. 

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Collies Bred or Kittens Ported

Today, my mom got two puppies. Their names are NOT Babs and Judy, despite valiant effort on my end.

My mom insisted that they have DOG names, but they are almost a year old and already have names, so we’re not changing them.

Below, I present to you Katie and Dolly [two names that are decidedly UN-dog, HOWEVER their full, given, pedigree names are actually Hello, Dolly and Kiss Me Kate! CAN YOU EVEN!? I think I won in this scenario.]

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Katie, Me, and Dolly

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Katie
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Dolly (whom we’ve already nicknamed Dora for her insatiable explorer tendencies)

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PRECIOUS.